I am a senior in high school and my ex-boyfriend of 2 years broke up with
me (he’s a freshman in college) because he said that he really liked this girl he met at his university and wanted to try dating her. However, he says he still loves me and wants us to be together in the future (when he and the girl break up), and he told me that its okay if I date someone else as long as I’m not physically intimate with another guy and as long as I don’t like the guy more than him. My question is, should I agree to
this, and is it fair of him to ask me to do this?
gURL, I think it’s safe to say that you already suspect something’s fishy about the bargain your boy is trying to strike. First of all, put yourself in the other gURL’s shoes. How would you feel if you found out that you were essentially an experimental placeholder for some guy’s actual true love? And then think about the position you’re in. Supposedly, your ex believes that you’re his Ms. Right, but if he’s not willing to commit to you right here and now, then he has no right to ask you to hold off on love and sex for his sake, when there’s no guarantee over what might happen in the future.
Relationships end for all kinds of reasons. Sometimes, people just can’t get along anymore. Other times, it’s long distance or bad timing that gets in the way. Of course, if circumstances change, a broken-up couple might find that they can and want to be together. But if that happens, it should be on both people’s terms. You may be devastated, but you shouldn’t settle for a raw deal. If your ex were a decent dude, he wouldn’t be placing conditions on your love or giving his new relationship an expiration date.
What do you think, gURLs? Leave your comments below! Got a question? Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org!
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