I want to have a baby, but I’m only 14 and I don’t know If I’m ready for sex. But I love babies and I want one of my own. I already have names picked out and everything. I just want to be a mom. I am afraid to talk to anyone about it because I’m afraid of being judged. Is it crazy that I want a kid at my age or maybe when I get to about 16 or so? I know my parents wouldn’t approve. I feel obsessed and I just wanna have sex in hopes of “accidentally” getting pregnant. I need some help with changing my mind. Please somebody give me a reason to NOT want a baby. Is this normal? Maybe it’s just a phase. Am I the only one going through this??
Obsessions can be difficult to shake, but you need to understand how difficult it will be for you to handle having a baby at such a young age. Have you considered the constant sleepless nights or the reality that it will be very difficult for you to go to school and hang out with your friends and do ANY of the things that you take for granted right now. Having a child is a full-time responsibility. It is not all cuddling and cooing.
Also, have you thought about raising a child alone? Most guys your age will not be interested in having a child right now and raising a baby by yourself is no easy task. Think about how alone you will be and how difficult it will be to find a boyfriend when you have a toddler running around. If you’re thinking of accidentally getting pregnant when you have sex, you have to think about the guy’s feelings, too. It’s not just your decision. He will be held responsible, too, and he is probably not going to be OK with you abusing his trust and trying to get pregnant.
There are a lot of things to think about when you are trying to get pregnant and it sounds like you haven’t thought about most of those things. Take some time to imagine your life with a child. Think about all the things you won’t be able to do anymore and all the people you won’t be able to hang out with because you won’t have time. Also, realize that the experience of having a baby will still be there for you in a few years. Being prepared for that huge step in your life is a crucial part of having a child. If you’re not prepared, you won’t be the mom you want to be.