are there other ways to masturbate…?

Question: Are there any other ways to masturbate without fingering yourself?

Answer: Before I answer, allow me a second for a sex educator rant:

The fact that you need to ask this question reminds me that a lot of us are trapped by a fixation on penetration. This probably comes from the idea that penil /vaginal sex is the only "real" sex. As a result, people assume that even when there is no penis to be found for miles, you should act as if there is.

Okay, glad to get that off my chest! Now time for the facts.

Yes, there are plenty of other ways to masturbate besides fingering (or inserting fingers into the vagina). In fact, a lot of girls don’t ever put anything in their vagina when they masturbate.

For most girls, the clitoris and not the vagina, is the most sensitive part of the body. The clitoris can be hard to find, but rest assured, it’s there.

The best way to locate it? Look between your legs and part your labia (lips). The inner labia meet over the clitoris, forming its hood. The body of the clit is inside you, but you can generally see the head. It might look a little like the end of your finger or the tip of your nose.

Some girls rub the clitoris with their hands, or with an object like a vibrator. But if touching your clitoris directly seems too sensitive, you might want to rub it indirectly, using your labia to block a bit of the contact.

Plenty of girls really enjoy penetration. Others are losing out by focusing too much on the vagina and ignoring the organ that is actually jam-packed with nerve endings

Got your own question for the expert? Send an email to with the subject line: Question: sex ed blog.

Posted in: Ask an Expert, Down There, Health, Sex & Relationships
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  • Emily3331

    Get a boy and f*ck him. Easiest way. 🙂

    I’m 13, and a girl by the way

    • Sarah M.

      Nobody cares about your age or gender, Emily.

  • Mj

    My spouse is and on meds therefore my sex life is not up to part. I am 52 and have always had a high libido. I stay horney and find myself mastuubating. It feels so good, but I need to order a low speed vibrator. Can anyone tell me where I can order one?

  • Zzzzzzaaa

    Take off your pants (underwear is optional) take a pillow and put it between your legs and make sure the corner of the pillow is against your vag and hump it, at first you may not feel aroused but I got an orgasm within 5 mins just speed up and do it harder progressively.

  • yummy

    Well Those Aree Good Wayss , I Love The Shower Head Thing . But Try An Electric Toothbrush And Take The Partt That's Not Pointy And Place It Between Your Lips . It Feels SOOO Goodd ! Also Look For Your Moms Sex Toyyss ..

  • mclover

    I masturbate all the time. Like, every night. I just think it's so amazing. I'm getting horny just reading all these comments. I dont really feel anything from fingering, but I find rubbing amazing. I get an orgasm everytime. I really wanna try oral too.

    I've tried the shower head. It's addictive!! When you start, you find it really hard to stop, it feels so good.

    any new ideas??

  • WOW! Very well said 🙂 You're really sexpert, you've got good advices 🙂
    Keep posting about Q&A, thank you!

  • Roxi

    i usually take a long pillow and just hump it. and i found my moms sex toy drawer and found a really sexy sex outfit. so i put it on and took a pillow and humped it for like an hour!