my brother thinks i’m annoying

dear heather,

My brother and I used to be kind of close. Then everyone began totally dissing their brothers so I just didn’t talk with him for a while; we grew apart until it was hatred. Now I don’t want to be as close with him as before but I’d rather not be his enemy. Any tips on how to try and convince him I am not an annoying little sister? Plz Help!

For a lot of people, there comes a time when it is cool not to like your family. Now that you’ve gone through that period and you want to be friends with your brother again, you’re finding it’s a little harder to get into his good graces again than you expected. Well, to be honest, your brother’s reluctance to jump right back into being great friends is only natural; it’s hard for people to turn their feelings on and off like a light switch, especially when they might be dealing with some problems of their own. The good (and potentially bad) thing about family, though, is that pretty much whatever happens, you’re tied to your brother in way that is much different than a friendship. No matter what you’ve done, your brother and you have been forged through the same familial fire–you have DNA as well as tons of experiences in common–and those things, the ups and downs, tend to count for something in the long run.Your relationship with a family member tends to be an ever-changing process throughout your whole life. Most likely he’ll give you the benefit of the doubt about being a good person sooner or later. Because of this, I’d suggest that you just take things slowly with your brother and do your best not to force the issue: A good way to prove you’re not an annoying little sister is to give your brother some space. It might also help re-build your friendship if you make some small efforts to be nice and considerate, perhaps offering some form of apology, so somehow he knows that you recognize you were being a jerk to him. It is pretty likely that eventually all these little things will add up and he’ll begin to see he can trust you again and that you really do care about him.

take care,
heather


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