I’ve been best friends with this girl for 3 years. About a year ago I started to really become jealous of her. I want everything she has–like all the people who love her.
Every time I’m with her and other people, I feel like I’m not wanted. Like I’m only being tolerated because she’s there. I don’t really even like shopping with her because she tries on a lot of the same things I do, and I’m becoming afraid of how much better she’ll look in them. It’s not only her body either–she smart, incredibly nice and understanding. I know nobody’s perfect but she’s so close it’s depressing.
I really hate myself for, in one way, loving her sooo much but also hating her. What can I do?
As you said, no one is even close to perfect. It may seem like your friend has everything, but surely there are some other elements to her that you aren’t quite so envious of.
In general, it’s a good idea not to compare yourself to your friend–or to anyone. It is not very constructive or useful because everyone in the world has such a different set of circumstances in their lives.
Also, you may think your friend is friendly, smart and looks good, but that doesn’t mean that you don’t have those qualities yourself. Whatever your own opinion and thoughts are about something, those are yours alone. It may seem like your friend would look better in clothes than you would, but other people might have a totally different view.
It may be helpful to tell your friend how you feel, although that may feel weird. Whatever you do, keep in mind that people are made up of a lot of different qualities and values, and that each person is unique in their own way.